Constant State of Chaos

Last night I told myself I was going to sleep in, well I guess that equals 6:30-HOORAY (sarcasm). I haven’t posted lately, and to be honest, that’s because I’ve been a little stressed. And, I’m not even sure that stressed is an accurate word to describe how I’ve been feeling, it’s more just living in a constant state of chaos.

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When Ryan and I moved in October to Colorado, I knew it wasn’t my favorite state in the world. To most, the sunshine and mountains draw them in. To me, I like “my mountain” and rain. It’s difficult for me to find the beauty here because it’s very similar to my home. It’s nearly the same if you remove the land locked of Colorado and gave Washington a little more sunshine.

But, when we moved, we moved for my work, and I could feel the Lord bringing us here. I’ve never felt that before, but I really was praying when we moved. I was trusting. And now, I’m here, thinking . . . why did I move again?

I don’t know if it is the need for the comforts of home or the realization that I knew I didn’t like Colorado. I feel like I uprooted our lives for a good job opportunity knowing that I didn’t actual want to be here. But then, I go back to that feeling I had when moving that there was a reason.

I’ve been reading Proverbs lately, and this is a pretty well-known verse, but it just had a different meaning when you truly are needing to trust in the Lord.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding: in all ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5-6

If you don’t know, I’m a really controlling person. I like all the control in my life, so when I fully trusted the Lord in moving here, it was probably a first for me. Now, I’m in a really challenging place because I’m continually having to rely on the Lord to show me why I’m here and what he has in store for me.

And, I realize that this is how life is supposed to be, but giving up that control and submitting to him can be difficult. I believe everyone’s been at this place, needing the Lord to give them guidance and direction. But if we aren’t willing to submit to him, how can we be open to listening to his guidance?

Personally, I think it’s’ a normal struggle. The feeling that your life is in complete chaos and struggling to fully let go and trust the Lord. Just remember, we weren’t meant to do this life thing alone.

– the Helm Household

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Buying your First Home: Are you ready?

I’m reflecting on Ryan and I buying our first home in 2014, and I’m truly thinking about the question: were we ready?

BUYING YOUR

 

Let me give you a little bit of a back story:

We bought our home in October of 2014 and sold it in October of 2015. I was 22 when we bought the home, and Ryan was 23 (almost 24).  My work wanted to move me out to Colorado, so it seemed like the right thing to do. I’d truly say God lined up everything and made everything work. The first person who looked at our house, ended up buying it.

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Currently, we live in an apartment. We went from 2,100 square feet to 675 square feet. It was an adjustment: no yard, one bedroom, one bathroom, etc. But, it’s been better than expected for me.

As I’ve mentioned before, I tend to be kind of a nomad or never really content with where I live. I always want to change, and I like having that flexibility. But, I struggle because we want to have kids eventually, and I don’t want to be the family that always moves. So, when we bought our house I thought it was the right idea, but now I’m thinking I wasn’t ready.

Mortgages are stressful.

We pay more for our apartment than we did for our house, but if something goes wrong, we don’t have to pay to fix it. When you buy a house, you fix it. That money comes out of your pocket.

You are stuck. 

I was 22 years old going on 40. Yes, you can always sell your house, but it isn’t like breaking a lease. You’re responsible for the house. If it doesn’t sell, you might have to take a loss? Or possibly stay there when you’re ready to move?

Starting out is expensive.

We bought a new construction home, and let’s just say we had at least an extra $4,000 in expenses. We had to buy a washer and dryer. And, we also had to buy blinds. BLINDS ARE EXPENSIVE. SO SO SO EXPENSIVE. Even if you get the cheap ones, they are expensive. Consider yourself warned.

Don’t settle. 

I wouldn’t say we settled, but there was definitely things we found out we didn’t like. We had a really small yard. And, that is fine, but it got old quick. There wasn’t room to spread out and just be outside. We also had a back load garage, where you drove down an ally.  Neither of us had ever lived in one, and it sounded okay but it wasn’t. There was no place to wash your car. And, our front windows then were really close to the sidewalks. It sounds weird, I know, but then if your expensive blinds are open, you feel like someone walking on the sidewalk is in your living room.

Your time withers away.

There is always something to do at the house. Paint, clean, you name it. It literally takes me 30 minutes to clean my apartment. It took me an hour and a half to  clean the house. Think about those things, sometimes it’s nice to not have to clean three bathrooms.

Now, done with the seriousness. It’s time for funny things you don’t think about . . .

BASEBOARDS

AHHHHHHHH! My hatred for flat baseboards. The baseboards that are flat on top. They are a pain in the butt to clean. The dust just sits there, but you have to get on your hands and knees to clean them. I’m not saying don’t buy a house because of baseboards, but seriously you will stare at that dust and hate your life each and every time you have to clean it.

Garage Auto-Lights

Great in theory, however ours would never stay on unless it saw you moving. Ryan and I like to do a lot of DIY projects, so if we were painting something, the light would turn off. We’d be jumping up and down to try and turn the light back on. It was hilarious and annoying all rolled up into one.

Neighbors

Honestly, we had the best neighbor and the worst neighbor. And, you just get what you get. Our bad neighbor . . . he wrote passive aggressive notes on our car if we parked even slightly in front of his house. Let me remind you, we had back load garages, so it was the public road in front of our houses. And, he could still fit 2 cars in front of his house, but he still wrote us notes with the date and a number circled. That number kept increasing each time it happened. So, when I went to confront him about it, he said it wasn’t him. Fast forward: my parents parked half way in front of his house . . . he proceeded to move his car from his garage to the front of his house and then cussed my mom out. He also called me a “little girl”, and I just thought . . . this little girl can afford the same house you can, mister. So, ya neighbors can be a drag.

I’m not saying owning a home was a bad thing. I’m just saying I wasn’t ready. It’s a big decision, and if I could go back, I wouldn’t buy one the year I got married. I would’ve waited a bit to settle in. But, I tend to do things backwards, so now we live in an apartment.

Don’t forget to follow me on Twitter @HelmHousehold!

– the Helm Household

Why you need to move in your 20s

I remember being 20, I had just graduated from college, and I was moving to Illinois from Washington. See my boyfriend of 8 months, now my husband, lived in Illinois and was still in school. He flew out for my graduation party, and we packed up and were on the road in the next couple of days.

Let’s just say I balled my eyes out the first night in the hotel. Like balled. I’d miss my family, I didn’t know anyone, what was I thinking moving in with a guy I’d only known for 8 months? Side note: 8 months of living in two different places, and only being around each other for maybe a month of it. 

That was in 2012. Now, it’s 2016, and since then, I’ve lived in Illinois for 2 years, Washington for just over a year, and now Colorado for 5 months. And, I haven’t even turned 24 yet.

It’s kind of unbelievable how much we’ve moved, it’s really been an adventure. Honestly, I’d never want to do it with kids, but since we just have us and our dog it’s been pretty easy.

But why is it important to move in your 20s?

  • Maybe where you grew up, really isn’t where you want to live forever

Shocker! I know. But, if you don’t allow for yourself to move away, you won’t know that. My husband is a great example. He grew up in a town of 1,200 people, and he thought he would live there forever. He then met me, and I ruined that, but he currently loves Colorado. If he hadn’t been okay with moving, he wouldn’t know that.

  • To explore! 

Let’s be honest, it doesn’t sound awesome to live in the middle of Illinois. At least it didn’t to me. But, when we lived near Springfield, we were 3 hours from Chicago, 1.5 from St. Louis, 3 hours from Indianapolis, 6 hours from Nashville, and 5 hours from Cincinnati. Sounds a little bit better, right? We were able to see so much of the United States from just being there and being in such a close driving distance from everything.

  • Living on your own and relying on yourself

This can be either with a significant other or if you are moving just by yourself. Colorado is the first place where neither of our parents are. We’re relying on each other to do everything. Who knew boarding your dog cost so much? Or that it sucks when your car gets totaled and you only have one car for an entire week?

Let me tell you, you might hate it at first. But, allowing yourself to embrace it is much easier. I had to learn that the hard way moving to Colorado. I did not want to be here at all. I wasn’t ready to move from Washington and near my parents, we had only been there a year.  And, I was mad. Everything about Colorado made me mad, but then I decided to embrace it.

I realize we aren’t going to live here forever, and my husband loves it. But, we do have this time now to explore, and I’ve been realizing it’s been good for us. You can always move back or settle down when you decide to have kids. But, when you’re in your 20s, it’s your time to explore.

Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram!

 

-the Helm Household

Most Recent Move: Colorado

Our most recent move was from Washington, not DC, to Colorado. We moved for work, like most people, and I’m currently still deciding if I like it.

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The biggest change for me was we sold our house and now we live in an apartment. Why you ask? It’s so difficult to find a home while selling a home, plus we’re young and we weren’t sure if we still wanted that responsibility.

Our lovely 672 square foot apartment was a huge downsize. I wasn’t sure if we would be able to manage it with our little pup, but it works. Location was the biggest deal to us.

Why location? My husband and I grew up in two different worlds. I grew up in a suburb of Seattle, whereas my husband grew up in 2,000 person town in Central Illinois. We both prefer to be close to things, yet not in the big city like Denver. We found a complex in walking distance to restaurants, shops, and Starbucks (which is 100% needed moving from Seattle).

I highly recommend when moving to find somewhere that you like the location. It’s the thing they never stop saying when you buy a house, but what about living in an apartment? Don’t you want to like where you live? Although the rent might be a bit higher–it’s worth it. You want to come home everyday after work and be where you like. If having easy access to camping and hiking is important? Move to the location that has that, even if it means you have to drive a little longer to work.

With this move, we are trying to be positive. I’m trying to still figure out how to run a mile with this Colorado sunshine and altitude. Follow @theHelmHousehold on Instagram to not miss any posts.

-the Helm Household